Faux Fu

Wednesday, May 29, 2019

The End Times!

Tornados in the heartland. An astounding number of tornados yesterday. Freaky.

"What is a Tornado?"  - "A tornado is a violent rotating column of air extending from a thunderstorm to the ground. The most violent tornadoes are capable of tremendous destruction with wind speeds of up to 300 mph. They can destroy large buildings, uproot trees and hurl vehicles hundreds of yards. They can also drive straw into trees. Damage paths can be in excess of one mile wide to 50 miles long."

Crazy-ass winds. Major flooding. Strange temps. It's getting weird out there. "It was the weirdest of times, and the strangest of times." Welcome to the Thunder-Dome!

My friend tells me we are in the "End Times!" I mean, hasn't it always been the End Times? It does seem like we have crossed a threshold. We have entered a new Phase of Abnormality! I sort of, kind of  believe her. I don't want to think that we have destroyed the basic web of life, that we have fractured our supporting habitat for our meager existence, but the dark, forbidding signs are all around us.

And don't forget that the Mad, Idiot King is still on his fricking anti-constitutional throne. No one has the heart to tell him it's actually a golden toilet. No one has the heart to tell him he is living on borrowed time, that there is a trap-door underneath the toilet, with an orange jump-suit, handcuffs and a long, well-deserved bill of indictments waiting to be served.

Still, we are all suffering for the King's lunacy & idiocy. Something is rotten in the State of the Nation. Putrid, stinking death rises up from the slobbery mud.

Crops will die. Locusts will descend from the heavens. Rivers will flood. Dogs will walk backwards and speak in tongues. Winds will rip heartland towns to shreds. The airwaves will be filled with thunderous lies, the cries of falsely-imprisoned migrant children, and the gnashing of razor-sharp teeth.  A reckoning is coming. Yikes!

"It's hard out here for a pimp!"

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