Faux Fu

Saturday, October 31, 2009

Dumps Vs. Sunny

Certainly is it the dichotomy I live with. Dumps and Sunny are the battlers, I am the battlefield.

Each wants to win. Each has their strengths.

On the Dumps side you have: pestilence, war, death, stupidity, hatred, prejudice.

On the Sunny side you have: coffee.

And the winner is: SUNNY!

Friday, October 30, 2009

We are over here, they are over there...

Don't know what Obama is gonna decide on the Afghan Clusterfuck. Hope he figures out how to bring the troops home. Seems the U.S.A. is just following the same zombie steps that helped bring down the Soviet Empire.

Then again maybe that's the game. Maybe Obama is our Gorbachev, a decent, intelligent man who happens to be at the wheel when an empire crumbles.

And maybe crumbling empires are good things.

Still the lesson seems to be simple: We are over here, they are over there, it's their home, who the hell do we think we are?

How many times does this lesson need to play out? Maybe the Afghans need to figure it all out for themselves?

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Avid Reader

I'm an avid reader. As David Bowie once remarked, "If I'm reading bullshit, the quality of my thinking is basically bullshit."

I suppose if I'm reading genius, the quality of my thinking is basically genius. But that's just my educated guess.

Is there some kind of secret narrative being transmitted to me? Here are two lines that jumped out at me as I was reading this morning...

In the Sports pages: "It's human nature to force explanations on things that sometimes neither have nor require an explanation."

And in the New Yorker: "According to a second theory, people are always trying to outdo one another; if everyone in a group agrees that men are jerks, then someone in the group is bound to argue that they're assholes."

Why do I think these are glimpses of some secret narrative? Is someone or something beaming messages to me?

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Humans - Long Distance Runners

I always thought I was running for a reason. Even if I didn't know the reason.

Like I was running for my ancestors or something. Or I was looking up in the sky for "birds of prey" to see if they were circling, and I was running to beat them to the prize.

Or I was running after some mythical animal that I was hunting. They pant, I sweat. Advantage me.

Or I was being chased by something. Something big and invisible.

Supposedly people can outrun horses over long distances on a hot day. Man, I know I bet on some ponies on hot summer days that I could have probably out-run.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

The Unfolding

You are a character in a story. There's parts of the story where you think you've been doing the writing, but then again, that might be a false impression.

And the story just gets curiouser and curiouser. It's a little maddening. You think you'd like to know where it's all going, how it will all turn out.

But then again, maybe it's better this way, the only way it could really be, you are playing your part, even when you don't know what your part is, and events just unfold. There's a mystery in the unfolding.

Maybe there's a higher purpose or meaning. Maybe not. Really it doesn't really matter. It's probably the unknowing that makes it all worthwhile going through.

Probably.

Maybe.

Or maybe not.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Wake Up Call

sunny jimmy: I guess, I see it as a wake up call.

lovely carla: How many wake up calls can one man have?

sunnyjimmy: About one every hour?!

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Heal That

This morning we hear more stories of bombs - car bombs and suicide bombers. We do share our lives with people of no conscience. Or people who believe so deeply in ideas that other people, or even their own lives don't count, they are only considered obstacles or a means to some distant goal.

Every car bomb, every suicide bomber undermines all civilization. They undermine all of us. They destroy our supposed brotherhood. It's a sad thing. And really we are helpless in the face of it. I suppose that's the purpose and reason of terror. It's a cold logic that burns every human bridge.

That's not the world we want to live in. The world of terror. But it is there. Maybe not on our street. But that's probably more to do with luck than anything else.

We want to lean to the light, to do the right thing. We want to love our brothers and sisters. And we do.

But what of those with no conscience? What of those with random murder in their hearts? There's a hatred that burns for that coldness, that randomness. That evil.

How do we heal that? Or do we just pretend it doesn't have anything to do with us? Do we tell ourselves we can easily fix it, if we just shuffle the deck anew? Do we pretend those people aren't people like us?

Do we tell ourselves we are not implicated in those horrible acts too? Does that help? Does that heal?

Saturday, October 24, 2009

"Be an Upright Person, Handle Situations Correctly, Become a Boss!"

"For a person to live on earth, he has to face two worlds: the boundless world of the outside, and the world that exists inside a person."

A nice little conundrum we have on our hands don't you think?

Every man, woman and child a Boss!

Friday, October 23, 2009

The Adventures of Wrong Guy!

Names. I got a million of them. Some I've encouraged, some have just come out of the blue. I answer to all of them. Sometimes I'm just happy that I'm still around to be called anything!

There's the typical offshoots of James such as Jim and Jimmy. Then there's the ones a little off the ranch: Seamus, Jamos, Shamous, and Hamos. Really.

My dad used to call me J.R.

Sniveling Weasel used to call me T-Bone.

Lots of people call me Jimmy Jammer or just Jammer, or even improbably, Jam Master James!

The Asian Couple over at the dry cleaners came up with some good ones: Cowboy and Long Guy.

Talking about me, the Asian Woman tells the Lovely Carla: "He rook rike Cowboy!"

And the Asian Man calls me Long Guy, which actually comes out sounding like "Wrong Guy."

I must say that's got to be my favorite. Wrong Guy. As in, Wrong Guy in a world gone wrong, or Wrong Guy in a world gone right. Either way, I'm gloriously WRONG!

Thursday, October 22, 2009

The Healing Will Begin!

Hey everyone please check out this great new Blog Talk Radio show hosted by my wonderful Psychic Meditation teacher Kris Cahill! It premiered on Tuesday October 20. And will come at you live every week.

The show is a great introduction to Kris - a truly wonderful inspirer. Her first topic is HEALING!

.

Also please check out her Psychic Everyday blog too!

BTW: WWSP's song "Everything is Everything" opens the show. Very, very, very cool!

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

No Idol Moment for Jimmy!

I turned down my "Idol" moment. No, not the nationally televised version. A local variant. A producer approached me and asked if I'd like to be a Judge for a local Idol contest to be broadcast soon, live on TV.

At first I just didn't know what to say. Who doesn't want to be on TV? And maybe I could promote my band or theater group on the air-waves. Still, it just seemed weird. Me as a Judge. Me as Paula Abdul?!

I didn't want to disappoint the producer. A great guy. A class act.

Still after a day of contemplation I politely declined.*

I just don't see myself as a judge of anything. Even if it's all just for show. I mean, since I'm a performer myself, all my sympathy is with the people willing to get up on stage and give it a go. I'd hate to be the guy giving and taking away points!

I know what I like, but who am I to evaluate someone else's performance? I have never actually watched "American Idol," although, I'm pretty sure I know what it's about. I have no desire to see the show. I do not like the idea of turning everything into a contest.

That is not my conception of life. And I think of my favorite performers and wonder just how they'd do in a national singing contest - Neil Young, Bob Dylan, Patti Smith - they probably wouldn't have gotten past the first round. Hell, even the other guys in Buffalo Springfield told Neil Young he couldn't sing.

B.D: "The answer my friend, is blowing in the wind, the answer..."
IDOL Producer: "Next!"

N.Y.: "Oh to live on Sugar Mountain..."
IDOL Producter: "Next!"

P.S.: "Jesus died for somebody's sins, but..."
IDOL Producter: "Next!"

No, there will be no Idol moment for me. Unfortunately, I dance to a different drummer! And it's not on TV!

*Maybe this wasn't really a good test of my ethics or beliefs. There was no money on the table. What if there was, a lot or even a little cash could have changed my mind, I may have just bit my lip and done the thing. Who knows?!

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

"The Tragic Evolution of an Industrial Economy into a Financial Finagling Economy..." - JK

I do think there is a palpable and prevalent sense that we've been hoodwinked.

James Kunstler: "The sense that Wall Street has pulled off a coup d'etat and taken over the machinery of the United States is the most powerful meme out there now, and its power is growing in magnitude every day among all classes of Americans. I can't say how much it reflects reality. Even if it is a result of sheer happenstance - the tragic evolution of an industrial economy into a financial finagling economy - the citizens will still experience it as a stealing of their future."

And according to this article Capitalism as we know it is Dead!

"Once a society becomes successful it becomes arrogant, righteous, overconfident, corrupt, and decadent ... overspends ... costly wars ... wealth inequity and social tensions increase; and society enters a secular decline." Success makes us our own worst enemy."

Sounds familiar?!

Monday, October 19, 2009

Questions and Answers

Usually I just stick with the questions. But today I take questions and provide snappy answers too! These questions came to me from various questioners over the weekend - I tackle them now!

1. What should we do about Afghanistan? This one is easy. Get the hell out. Now!

2. Should I go on the drugs? No, do not go on the juice. You will blow up like a freaking balloon and you'll never get off!

3. Are we all getting crazier? Yes.

4. Is it obscene that Wall Street is swimming in money so soon after the Big Bailout? Yes, totally freaking obscene.

5. Is Obama gonna save us? It depends on how you define "save" and "us."

6. Where you going Big Man? I don't rightly know!

Sunday, October 18, 2009

The Night was...Moist

Our band WhiteWolfSonicPrincess was a late addition to the Around the Coyote Fest's musical line-up last night. We played to a handful of the art hipsters of Wicker Park in a cavernous old lumber yard. It was an un-heated space - exposed brick and aged timber. And the night was cold and damp.

The sound guy was superb, so when we fired up our amps and p.a. we filled the room with our jagged sound - the vocals were warm, the bass and guitar were mixed right. My little amp was pushed to it's limit.

It all came off well. We all love to perform. And our set is really becoming refined, a mix of songs and fiery poetic narratives. We are getting a little more theatrical in our approach. It feels like the right direction for our little outfit.

Smiles all around! And the hipsters warmed to us too.

UPDATE: Also on the bill last night was this great band Moxie Motive. They did an unplugged set, acoustic guitar, cello, violin and trumpet. Their lead singer Matt Duhaime has a great voice, he sings with passion. We watched transfixed. When he finished with John Lennon's "imagine" he had the lumber yard in the palm of his hand.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

"When the truth is found to be lies and all the joy within you dies don't you want somebody to love" - Grace Slick

Went to see the Coen brothers new movie "A Serious Man" last night. Those dudes know how to get under my skin.

As the lovely Carla so eloquently put it, their movie "makes you laugh at the same time they punch you in the gut." That's entertainment.

I think it works on so many levels. Another one of those works that throws you into an existential tail-spin. Although, maybe I'm just partial to existential tail spinning!

Really good stuff.

Friday, October 16, 2009

Limbaugh is Still a Big Fat Idiot!

Hey, I guess sometimes money doesn't have the final say. Sweet.

Maybe being a fat, imbecilic blowhard has consequences.

It is "poetic justice" when someone is felled by their own hubris. A verbose man strangled by his own words.

And of course, Al Franken was right all along.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Welcome to the Illusion We Live In

If you really want to validate your intuition that we human beings don't know "shit from Shinola" about the universe, well, just spend some time with the folks who study and theorize about it for a living.

For instance, take a gander at this little essay that made the NY Times Science section by Dennis Overbye.

If I'm reading this thing correctly, the universe is actually rippling backward in time (!?) to sabotage the Large Hadron Collider in Geneva. Why would the universe do this? Because the Higgs boson (no, this is not a type of Buffalo), which the collider is designed to unleash, is so horrific to the future of everything, that it must be killed in it's cradle.

So the theory says that the Large Hadron Collider will never work. It will always and forever be sabotaged by universal forces looking out for it's own self preservation.

Got that? The universe is conspiring against us so we don't completely, totally fuck things up. Physics has to be the ultimate trip, eh?

So, as the Bhagavad Gita told us many years ago - everything we see is Maya - Illusion. Or as William Blake once wrote: "If the doors of perception were cleansed every thing would appear to man as it is, infinite. For man has closed himself up, till he sees all things through narrow chinks of his cavern."

The trouble is taking massive doses of LSD or mescaline won't really open up those narrow chinks for long.

No, maybe the real "tragedy" of our existence is to be able to imagine the universe as it really is, but never be able to actually perceive it.

All come on and no come. And behind the scenes, under the cover of the great clouds of unknowing the real shit happens!

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Hall of Dementia

Malcolm Gladwell tells us why dog-fighting and football are equally barbaric.

It is estimated that the typical football player from high school, college, pros takes thousands of hits to the head. Kind of like a high speed car accident over and over.

Why is it entertaining to watch large men destroying their brains on fields of green? Why is it entertaining to watch two pit bulls tear each other to pieces?

I must admit I am horrified by the brutality of football. I must admit I almost never miss a Chicago Bears game.

Don't see how you can take violence out of violent game. The brutality is an in-born feature. I guess, if we were truly "civilized" football would not be tolerated.

Men and dogs brutalize each other for our entertainment. Really, what are we thinking?

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Mantra

Some days the mantra is simple: just don't hurt yourself!

Monday, October 12, 2009

Another Dog Difference

According to the Dog Whisperer, dogs will not follow an unstable leader.

Of course, as we have so very painfully learned over and over...

human beings will.

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Onion

It's kind of like peeling an onion. You keep digging deeper, figuring you are going to get to the heart of the matter, and as each layer is peeled away the onion gets smaller and smaller.

You get to the end of the peeling process and all you're left with is a bunch of layers sitting on the cutting board. The essence of "onion" is the accumulation of layers.

There is no other essence beyond the layers. Or at least not one you can see.

You realize that's the story of your life...

You are no wiser, but you have the makings of a hell of a sandwich!

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Something Out There

I think it is true.

There is Something Out There.

And we don't know what it is.

We get hints. We see glimmers. But The Something is never revealed.

There is a Mystery built into the Universe. It is built into our DNA.

It is what drives the Story forward.

But "forward" may be just another riddle.

And the "riddle" may actually be a Circle.

Friday, October 09, 2009

Golden Vibe!

Fan-fucking-tastic! Obama wins the Nobel Peace Prize!

In a world of turmoil Barack is a beacon of light. No doubt.

Ever since he was elected my peace of mind quotient has sky-rocketed, even as the seemingly intractable global problems seem to be multiplying.

You just know the guy intends to do the right thing.

Whether it all works out is an open question, but just the intent is PURE GOLD!

Thursday, October 08, 2009

Man Vs. Dog

I hang out with humans.

I hang out with dogs.

There are differences.

The most significant difference I can discern?

Dogs don't lie!

Wednesday, October 07, 2009

Saint Vincent

When I was a wee lad, my dad tried to instill in me that good old Vince Lombardi philosophy. At the time, I thought it was all a bunch of horse-shit. Lombardi was a coach, and his team the Green Bay Packers were perennial champs. Big deal.

But somewhere along the line, the Lombardi vibe seeped into me. So yesterday, when things got really weird, and yes, they got really David Lynchian weird, I kept telling myself, "when the going gets tough, the tough get going."

I realize Lombardi is really my Patron Saint, and when things get dark I never fail to "run to daylight."

Now that's a surprise!

Tuesday, October 06, 2009

Mixed Nuts

Awhile back I came across John Cassidy's take on the financial meltdown. In it he used the phrase "rational irrationality."

The phrase has been haunting me ever since. I mean, it was kind of like a "rosebud" moment, a single phrase that explains a life and culture gone off the rails.

Each person in a global chain performs a "rational" act, add them all together and the result is totally irrational, I mean, completely fucking crazy! And you can see it everywhere you look.

Bankers end up selling toxic assets (shit sandwiches), that they know are total crap, because, well, because they will make money, everyone else is doing it, and if they don't maybe they don't get promoted, or maybe they even lose their jobs. People got loans for houses they couldn't afford because, well because someone gave them the fucking money!

The Meat Industry ends up selling actual shit sandwiches that kill people because well, the guy at the factory doesn't want to work too hard, is trying to conserve energy, keep his job, the executives are watching the bottom line, the vendors they sell to won't inspect the meat because they are afraid they might find something and lose a supplier, and the person buying "Select Angus Beef" is pleasantly surprised that Sam's Club, or wherever, sells the stuff at a reasonable price.

Of course the result is death or disfigurement from a hamburger.

Cemetery employees were burying people, digging them up and reselling the plots. Hell, it probably made sense at the time. They needed to sell cemetery plots, they ran out of room, what the hell were they supposed to do?

We have reached the point where we can't even bury our dead!

You can run down the list - there are rational actors with rational reasons that can explain the long global chain that results in air we can't breathe, water we can't drink, food we can't eat. ETC.

And we all "tsk, tsk" and go on like it's all just GOD'S PLAN. We are freaking Nut-Jobs! Rational Freaking Nut Jobs!

Monday, October 05, 2009

We are the People Who Eat Shit and Say it Tastes Good Too!

Hey, do you eat hamburgers? I quit back in the early eighties.

If you still do eat burgers, you should check out this front page story from the NY Times yesterday, "The Burger That Shattered Her Life."

Kind of tells the journey of a burger. And it's not a pretty journey. Turns out the Meat Industry is just a bunch of cheap- ass sons of bitches who really don't care whether the ground beef you are cooking up on your stove is safe or not, as long as their profit margins are high.

As long as it's cheap, they are happy. Here's the nub of the story...

"Hamburgers were made from a mix of slaughterhouse trimmings and a mash-like product derived from scraps that were ground together at a plant in Wisconsin. The ingredients came from slaughterhouses in Nebraska, Texas and Uruguay, and from a South Dakota company that processes fatty trimmings and treats them with ammonia to kill bacteria. Using a combination of sources — a practice followed by most large producers of fresh and packaged hamburger — allowed Cargill to spend about 25 percent less than it would have for cuts of whole meat."

And what was it that destroyed that poor woman? E.COLI! And where does that nasty pathogen come from?

SHIT! Eat it.

Sunday, October 04, 2009

Freudian

I'm a big David Letterman fan. I don't stay up and watch often, but when I do, Dave comes across to me as great curmudgeonly old friend. He's got a unique schtick. Often his jokes aren't really jokes. Sort of a weird post-modern type of comedy.

One quirk which for years drove me batty: Monica Lewinsky jokes. Years after Clinton was out of the White House, Dave was still reaching back to the Lewinsky well.

I mean, sometimes it was funny. But Dave seemed sort of obsessed with INTERNS.

Well it turns out it was kind of a Freudian thing...

Saturday, October 03, 2009

Weeping and Wailing

I think it's kind of funny, all the weeping and wailing about Chicago not getting the Olympics. A lot of Chicagoans breathed big a sigh of relief. We did not want to sign on for that boondoggle of a reality show. Our little Mussolini of a Mayor will have to find something else with which to burnish his flagging reputation.

I think some people are surprised that the rest of the world doesn't think the USA is the center of the world. Hard for some of us to swallow but true. We aren't. Even if we do have the great omniscient Oprah!

I don't buy the ideas that this tarnishes Obama in the least. The IOC did him a great big favor. The Olympics are a silly sideshow. And the Chicago Fat Cats would have surely mucked it up. We don't need it, we have the Chicago City Council for pointless games and brute displays of strength.

Friday, October 02, 2009

Olympic Fever Blisters

We'll find out later today if Chicago is to be an "Olympic" city. Obama made his pitch. The guy is quite the salesman. Despite my own misgivings, I think the odds are good for this teeming metropolis to get the "prize."

One must be careful for what one wishes for. Obama may rue the day. I guess we'll see.

We aren't just the "Windy City" anymore, the world probably knows us more as the place where Oprah and Michael Jordan made their fame.

So if we are to be an Olympic City, does that mean I have to go into training? Pump iron, jump hurdles, develop a synchronized swimming routine?

Just what does the average citizen need to do to Olympicize!

UPDATE: Oh JOY! It's Rio. That's great news! Obama got to do his thing. He did a favor for the Chicago Pols, but we don't have to suffer through the Fat Cat Feeding Frenzy the actual winning would have put us through. Obama is truly a blessed man!

Thursday, October 01, 2009

Forget Rio Too...

Ok forget Rio too. I mean, it's weird, yesterday I wrote about how it would be better if Chicago didn't get the Olympics. If you check out the latest New Yorker you'll probably decide that Rio isn't a very good choice either.

Did you ever see the movie City of God? That will give you an idea of what's going on over there. I mean I'm sure there's lots of great tourist hotels and shimmering beaches, but according to Jon Lee Anderson's article "Gangland," there is a brutal street life where entrenched drug gangs rule the roost. 5,000 murders a year.

You've got 10 year old kids running around with Nikes and automatic weapons...

"They are a totally entropic and anarchic group of young people who have figured out how to get what they want, which is basically, clothing, cars, and respect."

Might make the Olympics a little more interesting, but probably not what the IOC had in mind.

Okay, how about Tokyo?!

Blog Archive