WWSP's Shadow of th Marigold

Thursday, March 09, 2017

Suddenly a New Abyss in the Middle of My Being!

Changing the subject...

I had a dream two nights ago. It was more than a dream. Not just a "lucid dream."  It was more like a lived experience. Something that really happened to me in the middle of the night.

A fish emerged from my body. It rose up and traveled thru me. It began to push out thru my mouth. It was enormous. Not a little fish. A big, ugly, robust, thrashing, scaly, bug-eyed, slimy fish.

I was reminded of Jeff Goldblum in "The Fly," which I haven't seen since it came out many years ago. I can still recall the scenes where Goldblum's body goes thru it's metamorphosis. It was powerful. Horrifying. Recalled some kind of primal condition.

Anyway. This morning I Google "dreaming of fish," and come up with a few interpretations, here, here, & here. 

Doesn't quite explain it. Although, I kind of like these threads: 

  • Pagan: Great Mother goddess was often depicted as a fish or a woman with a fish over her genitals.
  • Chinese: Kwan-yin was often symbolized as a fish.
  • Indian: The goddess Kali was called the "fish-eyed one."
  • Egyptian: Isis was called the great fish of the abyss.

So what happened? Seems that big old fish emerged out of me. I believe I thrashed around on my bed for a bit as it made it's exit. I "passed out" or "went into shock." I woke up in a cold sweat.

All the next day I felt this incredible hollowness, an emptiness in the core of my being. Isis, yeah, maybe I'll go with that one - "the great fish of the abyss." 

Suddenly a new abyss right in the middle of my being. My tentative, halting, uncertain interpretation? I have reached some kind of stasis, an equilibrium. I am suspended within and without the great fish of the abyss.

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