Sleeping has been difficult lately. When I was younger, I could sleep any time any place at a drop of a hat. This morning, rising before the sun, I rise into profound darkness. It's a bit weird. This morning, I was out with my furry, four-legged friend before the sun made it's appearance. A cold & clear morning. There was a hushed glow coming from the East. Pinks and blues hovering on the horizon, seemed everything alive was anticipating the entrance of the glowing ball of fire.
That ball goes from a fiery red to a brilliant gold in a matter of a few minutes. I am now back in the kitchen sipping a bold coffee brew, listening to Radiohead's "A Moon-Shaped Pool," (2016) on the stereo. It may be their finest album. There is a relaxed brilliance, a mysterious feel, it is warm, not edgy.
I am hearing everything this morning in total glorious, stereophonic detail. Is it possible that with age my hearing is getting better? Probably not, but that's how it seems. Recently, one morning, thinking that I slept awkwardly, my ear pressed hard to the pillow, my hearing seemed to be compromised, fading away, everything sounded like it was coming from a cheap transistor radio. A bit of a scare there. I thought of that amazing, beautiful, daunting movie "Sound of Metal," (2019), you know, you really don't know what you have until you lose it. We take so much for granted. Once I got out in the cold, fresh air, my hearing came back in it's full glory. Now I hear every little thing in absolute detail. More sensitive than ever. Strange. Of course, my hearing is vital to me. Listening to music, playing music, using my ears to arrange songs, mix songs, playing with a band.
In some ways I feel more sensitized to everything, all my senses on fire, alive and awake. Is that an age thing, or an anti-age thing? I am hearing every detail, seeing everything clearly too. I mean, I do use reading glasses, without them close things are a bit blurry, but my long vision is clear and detailed. Emotionally and intellectually I am sensitized too. It's a wicked double-edged sword all around. A finely tuned instrument of perception, taking everything in, easily upset, easily thrown off. Day to day it's a struggle to maintain a healthy balance in all things. All you can do is show up and do the things you choose to do. And do them with all your heart and soul.
