"He Had to Do It!"

I accidentally tuned into Chicago's public radio station WBEZ last night to listen to Mayor Rahm Emanuel's speech to the Chicago City Council. I do think it's worth listening to the complete speech. Not the sound bites. Not just the political reaction.

I can't remember ever hearing a speech like it. Ever. Not often do you hear a politician say they "own" a problem, not often do you hear a politician say they are "sorry." Not often do you hear someone's voice break while talking about parent's "burying their children." Not often do you hear a politician accept that there are major, systemic problems rampant in their city. And change, major change, and reform, must come. Not often do you hear a politician "welcome" a Federal investigation.

To be honest, I didn't think Emanuel had it in him. Not sure I believe him. I'm not a fan or supporter. I don't think he has been a "good" mayor. I never got the impression that he cared about anyone or anything except power and other power brokers. And as my friend put it, "He had to do it!" Yes, it may have dawned on the Mayor that he has lost the trust of the people of the City. Trust has been broken with him, his administration, his police force, and his cops on the beat.

You wonder if this was a speech of political desperation. Is this just a ploy, political theater, acting? Hard to know. Obviously Emanuel wants to keep his job. And he sounds like a guy that knows he has lost the trust of the people he serves. You wonder if there's more smoke, more tragedy, more political dirt to be uncovered.

Still, just as political theater, it was a pretty extraordinary speech.

No Matter How Big, No Matter How Small

This is the kind of thing you "know," but then, events conspire to reveal it to you again, and it hits you deep inside, and changes your outlook on everything...

Every action, every thought, no matter how, big, how small, counts... absolutely...

Is that a "good" way to live? Yes, it is, it is mindful living. Essential. The only way to live fully.

Every breath
Every thought
Every bite
Every chew
Every step
Every _____
Etc.

Advice. Given. Taken.

Advice. Given. Taken. We do both. Give advice. Take advice. Or not. How is it that some advice just rolls off our back, like water off a duck's ass? And then one day, that same advice hits home? 

Or sometimes someone gives you advice and it pisses you off, you think, how dare someone tell me what to do, or how to do, or whatever, and then, another day and time, their words strike deep into our solar plexus, and the light-bulb pops on, and our world is transformed.

That happens too.

And usually it's simple stuff. How to hold something. How to entertain an idea. How to chew, or breathe. What to eat. What not to eat. Often the best advice is so simple, you think it's "simple-minded." That's usually a clue that the advice is worth taking in.

Examples? Play guitar? How do you hold your pick? Do you pick with upstrokes & downstrokes? Where do you strum  - near the neck or bridge? Think of intervals! Thinking of music as "intervals" on a fretboard changed my life!

I listened to this show On Being, "The Evolution of Medicine," early Sunday morning.  Every word of this show hit home. Every word. What was so powerful and eye-opening? The breathing & eating advice. World-shaking. Changes everything. Simple. Advice.

Inhabited by Beings

Inhabited by beings. It's a concept I learned about in some of our "psychic" work.

Is that a thing? Yes, I believe so. You are a human being. You have some kind of physical integrity, you have a body, a mind, you have habits, and routines. You think and say stuff. You walk around in the world.

You don't know it, but you can be infested with other beings. You are the host, and invaders enter, and inhabit you. And take over the control panel. And once other beings take control, all your habits and routines are subject to change. How you look, how you think, how you act in the world, suddenly morph.

How do these other beings do it? Sometimes it happens in a blink of the eye. A word, a thought, can open the door.

Or it can be food or drink. Or alcohol, drugs. You can't see yourself, when you are inhabited. You don't know! You are blind to the infestation. Your body, your mind, is held captive by other forces. 

I have witnessed this phenomenon. It's a sad and scary thing to witness. You are helpless. You can't do anything except sort of guide the victim to a safe environment. Try your best to get them somewhere where they won't hurt themselves or others.

It's kind of like a voodoo thing. Do I believe in voodoo? Yes, I'm sorry to say, I do... the voodoo comes from anything that can enter a being... and a being can be entered! 

Judgement

To judge and be judged. It's a human thing. Is it better to welcome judgement? Is that a sign of strength? Or should we try to drop judgement? Is that even possible?

The Ask!

Yes, I read Amanda Palmer's "The Art of Asking." I put it down thinking, "I'm not Amanda." And I'm not. But I do, like her, consider myself an "artist," I'm a writer, an actor, a director, a guitar player, a singer, a songwriter. Maybe I'm not as focused as I should be, but I like to explore, and try new things. I don't make lots of money on any of these activities, but if you took them away from me, it would be like robbing me of a "reason to live."

Anyway, my creative collaborators and I do our work as if it is the most important thing in the world. And it really is, I believe in the transformative power of creativity. I believe it and live it, and celebrate it in others. 

This is all a roundabout way of saying that our band whitewolfsonicprincess has been working on a new record for nearly 3 years. We expect to release the record as a limited edition CD and hi-res digital downloads in early 2016.

It is called "The Shadow of the Marigold," and it is the most finished and fully realized work we have ever done. We are asking friends and fans and strangers to support our effort to release this record. So we have turned to crowdfunding on IndieGoGo.  Check out our page. Lots of cool premiums. Claim one! We are truly an independent band, no big label, no corporate daddies. We do it all on our own. Follow the dream. Do the best work we can. Leave it to art. It's something good. Something important. As we say, "it's a beautiful, well-made thing."

People Need to Fix It!

Yes, it is madness. A hearty thank you to the NY Daily News for this powerful front page:

I don't know if New York's Daily News is an esteemed newspaper, or not, but it has filtered back to me, that their Editors have consistently called out the lunacy of our "gun culture."

And the "cowardice," of many of the politicians, who have decided that we just have to live with "all guns/all the time."

There are politicians on the NRA payroll who tell us, there's nothing to do, nothing can be done except to "tsk, tsk" at all the mayhem, and to pray for the victims. If these idiots want to leave it all to God, get out of the public square. We need smart people willing to roll up their sleeves and do the work of making this a better place.

It is irresponsible and despicable to wring your hands and act as if nothing can be done.

There are plenty of common sense measures we could take, to make this a much safer place. Off the top of my head: strict licensing (it should be harder to get a gun than to buy a car), national gun database, ban assault weapons, ban bullets, require expensive liability insurance for gun owners, generous gun buy-back programs, mental health examinations for anyone who wants to buy & own a gun - I am convinced gun ownership itself is a sign of mental illness, etc.

The Pros Come Through!

If you check out recent posts, you can see that I've been on the "Chicago Police Scandal." The dash-cam really hit me hard. 

The cold disregard for life is really, really disturbing. And a bunch of Cops on the scene did not accurately report the event. And it took some determined folks to bring it all to light. Almost didn't happen.

The professional writers over at the New York Times Editorial Board say it all quite well, so I feel it's important to to link to their editorial...

Lots of great stuff... The Mayor's "willful ignorance..." "complete lack of comprehension," "too little too late," and "lost credibility."

And there's this: "The Justice Department, which is already looking at the McDonald killing, needs to investigate every aspect of this case, determine how the cover-up happened and charge anyone found complicit. The investigation needs to begin with the Police Department’s news release of Oct. 21, 2014, which incorrectly states that Mr. McDonald was shot while approaching police officers with a knife. A dash cam video that was likely available within hours of the shooting on Oct. 20 shows Mr. McDonald veering away from the officer when he was shot 16 times, mainly while lying on the pavement. Why does the video completely contradict that press release?"

Good stuff. Nice to see the "pros" come through!

"Hates the Weak!"

Rick Perlstein has a great article on Trump. Brilliant. Explains a lot. Here's the last line: 

"... they love him because he - like them - hates the weak."

I began thinking this is the crux of not only Trumpism, and our current Political culture, but also a fundamental pillar to many of our societal problems, and well, hell, it may even be the key to much of the History of Mankind. The whole shebang!

Why is it that human beings revere the "strong-man" and hate the weak? It seems to be so. I mean, if you know your history you see a long, unrelenting string of the strutting strong ones followed by the teeming hordes.

Think of all the strong leaders, the Big Men, the Big Daddies, the Kings, the Dictators, the Rulers, the Presidents, etc.

Remember, people cried, when Stalin died. So yes, maybe it's because we are essentially hierarchical creatures.

So when we see a Big Strong White Cop shooting down a Young Black Kid, many of us actually identify with the Cop! We see ourselves as the powerful one in the equation. 

On the other hand, why is it, how is it, that some of us always see ourselves in the weak ones? How is it that some of us do not revere the strongman?

I wonder if it's in our DNA? Some of us want to bow to the power, and want to be powerful themselves, others want to rebel against the power, and identify with the "have nots," the weak, the downtrodden.

Think of the "weak ones," those who suffered, and stood up for the sufferers: Jesus, Gandhi, MLK, Mandela, Dali Lama. They all represent our "better angels."

So anyway, this is deeper than the race issue, deeper than economics, deeper than politics. You can look at all our human turmoil and ask, who is strong, who is weak? And which side do you want to be on?

Whenever I see the strong vs. the weak, I always, always side with the weak one. I don't know why. Maybe it was being raised "catholic," maybe I just see myself in, and have empathy with, the underdog. Maybe it's as simple as: "There but for the grace of God go I." Not exactly sure why, but when I see the power squashing the little ones, I immediately, viscerally, totally identify with the little one. Every time.

I guess just put me in with Tom Joad: 

Wherever you can look – wherever there’s a fight, so hungry people can eat, I’ll be there. Wherever there’s a cop beatin’ up a guy, I’ll be there. I’ll be in the way guys yell when they’re mad. I’ll be in the way kids laugh when they’re hungry and they know supper’s ready, and when the people are eatin’ the stuff they raise and livin’ in the houses they build – I’ll be there, too.

Good Chicago Policing!

You watch that dash-cam video. And you can't get it out of your head. Beware where you put your attention.

You think, expect, hope, that people will join together and demand justice, and a change in the system. But instead you find out that the Police Union is "standing by" the murderer.

You'd think "good Cops" would want to distance themselves from the shooter. Doesn't their "code of silence" empower the "bad Cops?" 

Isn't the Fraternal Order of Police doing themselves a disservice? Do they really want to give the public the impression that the video shows what they think is good Chicago policing?

And yes, this is the "story within the story..." Cover-Up in Chicago! The Mayor, the State's Attorney, the Police Union all part of an effort to bury the truth. There's the crime, and the cover-up of the crime!

UPDATE: Yeah, it's not just one "bad apple." The Chicago Police Department is a corrupt institution - known for torture and police brutality. The Mayor just fired the Chicago Police Department Superintendent.  Think the Mayor is feeling the heat?! Shouldn't he be the next to go?!

We All Come from Wolfpacks!

We watched the documentary "The Wolfpack." It scans like fiction, you think it's fiction, but it's not. Very entertaining, disturbing, enlightening. So improbable.

Six brothers. Locked in an apartment. Their whole lives. They watch movies. All their culture is pop culture. They act and recreate movies as a sort of daily ritual. They act in and re-enact movies like "Pulp Fiction," Batman," and "Reservoir Dogs."

They do it religiously.

Sort of like "Lord of the Flies" in an apartment on the lower East side of Manhattan. The movie makes you think. About "socialization." About cults. And religions. And families.

And how we are all isolated by what we do. We are all members of wolfpacks. To greater and lesser degrees. There are the inside worlds we inhabit, and the outside worlds we matriculate in. They collide and influence each other.

What do we value? What do we do? Who do we emulate? And with the choices we make, who are we serving? Ourselves? Or others? How to live with integrity? And freedom? How to make our lives our own?

Great movie.

More Alive/Less Sensitive!

Yesterday, practicing cover songs for an upcoming show. 6 songs. Played them with two singers at our rehearsal space. Me on guitar. 6 songs, and we played each of them around 5 times. Multiply that and you get 30 songs. In a few hours. 

My fingertips. Every note etched into my fingertips. If you play guitar, you know about callouses. They are essential. They are your "badges of honor." You are changed by playing. It's almost like the strings, and where you place your fingers, are tatooed. You wear the changes. You are battle-tested. Hardened.

We recorded the last run-thru of songs and I just listened to the recording this morning. They all sound better than I thought they would. Satisfying. And my fingertips seem different. More alive, and less sensitive, at the same time.  

Disappoint/Surprise

Yes. People disappoint. That's a theme. 

Sometimes they surprise too. That's a theme too. 

Count on being disappointed and surprised. You wonder if it all evens out. Maybe if you extend the timeline into forever. 

Some days, some decades, it all seems like disappointment. Then again, there are always surprises along the way.  That's just the way it goes...

Sad. Hard to Explain.

You find out some one you know is a flaming, bone-headed racist. How to explain it? An intelligent person. One who has never actually had personal experience with people they feel "superior" to.

Baffling. Really. 

I mean, I know we all have some in-built bias, probably encoded inside us. Is it true that racism is "hard-wired in our brains?" Then none of us are exempt. But it is something we can recognize and work against. It is essential. To find empathy for our fellow beings. 

Celebrate and honor the differences between us. Maybe idealistic. But it's the only way.

 This deep hatred of people because of their "race" is just so confounding. Not something understandable. Sad. Hard to explain. Ugly.

A Few Heroes in an Ugly Saga!

A 17 year old gets gunned down by a Chicago Cop, and a dash-cam video (see previous post) is finally released. And then all this latent ugliness and bias comes out. Arguments about racism, Good Cops vs. Bad Cops, Good Kids vs. Bad Kids.

Your lying eyes see what looks like cold-blooded murder, but then you are surprised that your fellow citizens can't agree that murdering a young black kid, even if he was up to no good, is not a good thing. It's hard to believe that there are "sides" to that argument. I even read a post where someone said the kid "got what he deserved."

So yes, racism, ugliness, bias, stupidity, willful ignorance is rampant among us. The video just kind of brings all that out into the light of day.

Now the story became a story of a video, and "will the people riot." But there's actually another pretty amazing story within the story, that's even more interesting.  None of this would be in the public conversation without an "Anonymous Tipster," and "an Activist/Journalist" named Jamie Kalven.

Someone within the Chicago City Administration saw the video and realized it did not confirm the story told by the Cops on the scene. In fact, of course, it totally contradicted the story told by those Cops. That kid did not rush the Cops with a knife, he was in the distance sort of tacking away from the Cops. No way was that killer-Cop threatened, or fearing for his life.  Not believable!

And the City Administration and the Chicago Police Department wanted to bury that video. They did all they could to assure that it would not see the light of day. Luckily, the Activist/Journalist, once he was tipped off, decided to fight to get it released. And luckily a Cook County Judge agreed that it should be released.

So yes, there are some "heroes" in this terribly ugly saga: an Anonymous Tipster, and Activist/Journalist, and a Judge.  A few good people. People not happy with the cover story, not happy that the truth was buried. 

The difference between living in a totally corrupt place, and a maybe not quite so corrupt place? A few good people with the idea that the truth should be brought into the light of day. So yes, a Cop who committed a crime, and people of power and influence trying to hide that fact. You wonder if the perpetrators, the man who killed, those who knew the truth,  and those who lied and covered it up, will be held to account?

Don't Believe Your Lying Eyes!

They tell you, "don't believe your lying eyes." You can watch the dash-cam of a Chicago Cop shooting down a 17 year old black kid here. The kid may have been in the wrong place, wrong time, maybe that's a knife in his hand, but you think the "death penalty" isn't quite justified for the actions of this kid. The Cop shot at the kid 16 times... mind boggling... chilling... how often does this happen?

If you do believe your lying eyes the dash-cam seems to show a cold-blooded murder, an execution of a 17 year old kid. I know it's a Cop doing the shooting, and Cops do have tough jobs, but murder is murder. There is no reason that Cop should have "feared for his life." If he did, he is in the wrong job.

It took a year for this video to surface. A reporter was tipped and had to go to court to get it released. Some might say it looks like  Mayor Rahm Emanuel and the States Attorney Anita Alvarez were covering up for political convenience. Isn't that a crime?! What they call "Obstruction of Justice?!"

Makes Spike Lee's "Chirac" so of the moment. Unfortunately. I for one look forward to seeing Spike's movie. I still consider "Do the Right Thing" one of the greatest American films ever made. Tony Fitzpatrick talks about "Chirac" here. There is something seriously wrong in Chicago, in the Police department and the Mayor's office.

Here's the "Chirac" trailer..

CHI-RAQ Trailer from 40 Acres and a Mule Filmworks on Vimeo.

A Life of Fakery!

Someone hit me with this one, and it's resonated around in my head for awhile. I mean I've heard it before, but the conversation where it popped up was such an unlikely circumstance, I was down and out, staring at the abyss...

"Fake it till you make it." 

You know, it's a "positive feedback loop." Act like the thing you want to be, and in that way, you will become the thing you want to be.

I think about it, and well, much of my life has been faking it. No one told me I could be a writer, actor, director, song-writer, singer, guitar player. I just decided these were things I wanted to do.

I started doing them. And continued doing them. I faked my way through.

Now some folks may say it's all fakery. Still. But my life has been consumed with pursuing these things of fakery until finally my life is made of all these fake things. And it's a genuine life. A real, genuine pursuit.

A complete and convincing (at least to me), fakery.

Oh Yeah, and Clive Owen too!

More thoughts (see previous post), on the gorgeousness and fabulousness of "The Knick." We're about half-way through the 1st season, and caught up in a great narrative. The time is 1900 and the new century is one of discovery and invention. Thomas Edison is around hawking electricity and x-rays and the 1st phonograph.

And the key characters of the show are surgeons who are innovators - creative, driven, supremely passionate and flawed beings, trying to do things no one has done before. 

So yes, the form of the show, as conceived by Steven Soderbergh, and the theme of the show are totally aligned.

Soderbergh is an innovator - creative, driven, supremely passionate about creating a unique, beautifully filmed series. He pushes himself to create scenes in a new way. And uses the latest technology. But what's brilliant and uncommon -  he uses cutting edge technology, and his painter's eye, to film like the old masters. This is not a CGI fest, but a merging of old and new worlds.

So yes, available light, candlelight. Powerful digital camera, giving us exquisitely composed scenes. A powerful dichotomy. 

Also wanted to mention the soundtrack. The music pulls you out of it all. It's sort of a "techno," keyboard-driven sound. Not of the time at all. But for me this works beautifully too. In a way, the music is the atmosphere of imagination, and creativity, and technical invention that hovers over all the action.

The series seems to celebrate the best of us. Flawed beings that are able to transcend themselves to discover, experiment, and achieve things that have never been attempted or achieved before. And of course, there's the obsession, the delusion, the ego, the misguided, un-channeled passion that drives and consumes us all.

It's a time of sexism, racism, classism, ignorance, and hubris. Oh yeah, just like today!

Did I give you the impression that I think this series is absolutely brilliant? Oh yeah, and Clive Owen too. Thrilling!

The Gorgeousness of "The Knick!"

Watch a few episodes of "The Knick," and you very quickly realize you are watching something "revolutionary." Actually the first scene of the first episode will tip you off that something extraordinary is going on with this cable TV series.

Yes, the characters are compelling, there's great acting going on, a dynamic narrative, but it's the look and feel of the show that is something new, something different, something really unique. I actually Googled "What kind of camera is used filming The Knick?" 

It looks like rich, saturated film, you know, the old kind of technology used by masters like Stanley Kubrick, but you find out that no, Steven Soderbergh uses a digital camera called "Red Epic Dragon." And its small and light, and can film in very low light, any available light like candlelight. 

And Soderbergh uses it like a master. This show is a labor of love, and a feat of technical mastery. Really. And it's beautiful. Nearly every scene is rich, layered, colorful, beautiful. Made me immediately think of Kubrick, you know like Kubrick from "Eyes Wide Shut."

Soderbergh shot every episode. He works quickly, he edits the series too. All handheld, puts the camera in unique places, gives us a true feast for the eyes. A true, a pure, auteur approach. Pretty amazing. High art. Gorgeous.

Gold Coins in the Garden!

A great little web article about Paul McCartney and John Lennon. 

"I think John's whole life was a cry for help." - Paul McCartney

And maybe that's why Lennon was so compelling, fascinating, exciting. And of course, Paul an amazingly creative, charismatic, musical genius. What a great song-writing team.

When I think Beatles music, I think: joy, exuberance, inventiveness, creativity, energy, melody. And all those things are there in the tracks. But what gives it all power is that very real pain, loss, doubt, and an insatiable unhappiness, unsettledness. Maybe it's that combo that makes the music so over-powering.

And what of their joint prophetic dream? They both had the same dream!? The mystical path on practical feet!