Raised by "Lady-Wolves."

I think of my childhood as a bit "raised by nuns." Very similiar to being "raised by wolves." These particular "wolves" were women, dressed in black & white habits, with gold wedding bands on their ring fingers (married to God don't you know). They were kind of scary, harsh, maybe bitter that they were stuck in classrooms with 30 or so children every day of the school year. 

What were these lady-wolves trying to teach us? Mainly fear of God. God was an old, bearded man, sitting on a throne; a scary, harsh, bitter God that would be judging all of us somewhere down the line.  For me, for some reason, the lesson just never took. Maybe because at home, in my own world, I was a happy little gangster, with my own gang, my little brother & my two sisters. 

Sure, I was left with a bit of guilt & shame for being a gnarly, snot-nosed kid, but that deep, in-bred fear just never did materialize. The story just seemed so improbable. I am the same today. The fear-mongers and their fear-mongering just doesn't work on me. I think those folks are just too full of shite. I can't take them seriously. It might be a flaw in my character.

This new era of hate, racism, division, unthinking idiocy just rolls off my back. I don't get it at all. It doesn't resonate. Maybe I can thank those "lady-wolves," maybe they unintentionally innoculated me to the ways of manufactured fear and idiocy?

The lessons I learned on the playground, at lunch, and after school, were the ones that really did sink in, and are still with me to this day: "The Big Ones will always stomp on the Little Ones." And, well, "There but for the Grace of God, go I."

Invaluable information. 

Kind of gave me a code for better understanding and better living in the real world. And when the Big Ones beat up on the little powerless Ones, I immediately side with those being beaten down. 

Ha. Now that I think of it, that seemed to be the gist of the whole weird Jesus story too. Jesus was a nice, helpful guy, who looked out for the poor & downtrodden. His whole schtick just didn't sit well with the powers that be. That simple Jesus story has been twisted into a goddamned pretzel by the crazy-ass Christian Nationalists. Seems they have forgotton that whole Love, Forgiveness and taking care of your Brothers & Sisters idea, and replaced it with a stone-cold, racism & Hate. Fuck those fuckers.

Anyway. Amen Brothers & Sisters! And an early morning tip of the hat to the Lady-Wolves...