Faux Fu

Wednesday, August 04, 2004

Stormy night, stormy day.

Yesterday was the perfect storm. I have become the 'contrarian' at the little entreprenurial company where I work. I almost always come down on the side of our 'Customers.' This puts me in conflict with the management team.

There is something tribal about the way people band together to disparage the other, the outsider. I usually try to see the validity of the 'other side.' This leads to friction, or outright hostility, from members of 'my team.'

All my 'successes' have come from being able to get two sides to the table: to talk, to listen, to compromise. I usually have to 'work' both sides of the equation.

I am criticized for being soft, for wanting to be liked, for wanting everyone to get along. I believe these are my strengths. I come to a 'deal' assuming that all parties are 'good intentioned.'

I try to come from a place of 'humility.' This is perceived as 'weak,' or 'not loyal.' I guess maybe I'm not loyal. Or I'm loyal to something else. So, I am not comfortable in the group, I'm always looking beyond the group to another reality. I am alone, but of course, I'm not the only one who is alone.

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