Faux Fu

Thursday, August 06, 2020

A Nightmare Unlike Any Other...

A nightmare...

Picture it:
A large gathering. Maybe like the Grammy's, or the Oscars. Lots of famous people, celebrities from all over the world. Everyone dressed in their finest duds. There are TV cameras, this is a major event that is being broadcast across the globe. Imagine billions of eyes  riveted to screens, paying close attention to what's happening. You are there, on the spot. You are expected to sing a song. A song you don't know. It's a Radiohead song. One you have never heard before. Funny. You have always had a difficult time understanding Thom Yorke when he sings. It usually takes many listens before you can begin to parse out the lyrics to his songs. It's one of the pleasures of listening to Radiohead. You take in the sound first, you let the sound-waves of the band and Thom's voice wash over you, and you come up with meanings later. But this is different. There is no pleasure in the not knowing. You don't know the lyrics, you don't know the melody. You have no clue how to sing this song. Someone has given you the sheet music, and it looks like Egyptian hieroglyphics. No help. In fact, the sheet music just confounds the problem. You have a "situation" on your hands. No way out. There you are. Nervous as hell. Sweating. Stumbling thru a song you don't know. This is your big opportunity to make an impression on billions of people around the world. And you are flailing, stumbling, halting, doing a really poor version of a mystery song you don't know. You think to yourself: Thom Yorke is going to be very displeased with my performance. There is no way around it... yikes...

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