Faux Fu

Sunday, March 20, 2005

"Life is a Carnival" - The Band

The color of spring in Chicago: gray. Yesterday, I was floating on air, today, I'm like that fat, green frog, bumping his ass on the ground. It's amazing how easily energy ebbs and flows. I felt so good, I ran so hard yesterday, my head was spinning the rest of the day. This morning, I'm a little slow and creaky, no spinning, just a quiet clarity. I'm thinking that 'feelings,' which we experience so intimately, which we trust so implicitly, are actually liars, cheats, deceivers! Beware your feelings dear Pilgrim! Take a deep breath, let the world in, breathe the world. The feelings of one humble Pilgrim are not so important, they don't describe anything, they may not even correspond to anything real. It's hard to tell, don't you think? We get all puffed up with how we feel, but aren't our feelings just self-fulfilling prophecies? Maybe we don't need to fill ourselves with ourselves, but, empty ourselves so that we can let the world come barrelling in. Hey that's when the Carnival begins!

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