I've always had "issues" with authority figures. Especially the human ones. Tuns out that human authority figures are really, really, human. Which means that aren't always what they say they are, they don't always really know what they say they know, and they don't always act as they say they act, or as they counsel others to act.
So these figures of authority come across as poseurs, or liars or worse. And it's often these figures of authority turn out to be disappointing on so many levels. And when another one falls, it just confirms all my suspicions about authority and humanity.
This has probably also seeped into my belief and trust in a "higher power." But you know, over the last 15 years or so, I have been able to kind of define my higher power as a very nebulous, amorphous and very much non-human force. And if we are talking about an abstract enigma, a force that just exists out there somewhere, kind of like gravity, or nature, or energy, I can believe.
I have experienced a presence of a higher power. I have had my little epiphanies. My spiritual mind-blowers. I do feel like I am swept up in an adventure that is much bigger than me. This is not just a belief, it's an experience. This experience is it for me.
This was a long strange process. And it has nothing to do with an organized religion or creed, or dogma.
Higher power. Yes. Of course.